Category Archives: Civility

Friendship is not beans!

Some friends are too petty for their own good.

Friend:
You keep malice because a friend didn’t pick or return your calls. You go cold because a friend forgot to use your picture as Profile picture or Dp, on your birthday. I, for instance, forget my own birthday regularly, (I’m now better, with Facebook). You are not happy with a friend because she didn’t show ‘enough’ excitement when ‘it’ happened for you. And so forth…

Please, grow up!
Accept that these things will happen here and there. Accept that they do not define your relationship as friends. If you think they do, it is not friendship; you’re just looking for people to use. It is good to have friends that never miss to pick or return your calls, and friends who mark all the key dates on your calendar, and so on. You may be blessed with a few such friends, but, and don’t get me wrong, these things don’t define friendship. Any (prospective) business associate can do those: keep dates, pick calls, return calls, etc.

Descriptions
Friendship is beyond sheer functionality and utility. Functionality and utility are vital, no doubt, but they are the superstructure, not the foundation, not the bottom-line of friendship. Friendship is in part a deliberate commitment to a person, a commitment sometimes triggered by chemistry or reasoned decision. More, friendship is a chemistry forged and sometimes forced upon our inner beings by forces (of attraction) that are hard to define. It is something like the ‘me’ in me, liking the ‘you’ in you.

Friendship is a connection, first at that inner, deeper level. It then finds expression at the functional level and is envigorated by the externalities of talk, and care, and laughter, and affirmations and gifts and quarrels and sundry such realities. But these externalities do not DEFINE it. They adorn it; yes, they consummate it. But they do not define friendship. Of course, some relationships evolve out of the functionality they offer, maybe due to shared location or vocation or other practical factors. The friends and/or people I happen to call more often are not necessarily my closest friends. It is not as simple as that. Friendship is a bond that is.

If we are friends at the level where it matters most, even if we have been (unavoidably) out of touch for 2 years, we will ‘fit’ — once we meet again. We may be awake till 3 or 4am, updating. It wouldn’t seem odd. Updates will flow from both ends until we are both up to date; then we will go on together from there. A true friend is not the sort of person you want to hold a grudge against for any pronounced length of time, if at all. You kind of adore him. A friend is a burden bearer. A friend sees you as a project that he has to make happen. And he knows you see him as such a project too. That’s why a friend doesn’t dump you because you erred. C’mon!

Generous!
With a friend, you usually will be generous in forgiving, just as you enjoy lavish forgiveness. When issues come up, they are discussed. You may shout at each other and argue, but you’ll do it as friends. Once you’re done shouting, nobody may win. Occasionally, nobody may say a heartfelt sorry. Sorry was not the the main goal anyway. Understanding was. Many times however, one person will see enough to say sorry. Or both parties may apologize for different roles played in the drama. But there is, through all the squabbles, a protected, hallowed  ‘Friends zone’ that the disagreement is not allowed to invade, to ruin. That’s what it means when we say ‘nothing can come between us’.

A friend always enjoys the benefit of the doubt. You make excuses for her. Your first line of reasoning, when she misbehaves usually runs like: “there must be some cogent reason that I don’t yet see, to explain this behaviour. Or, in any case, she may have been mistaken. I know she didn’t set out to offend me”. Your first take is not to assume the worst. That’s not how it works, if it is about a friend. And when you confirm that she was plain silly, you’d forgive, quite naturally, in advance, even before the apologies come.

To paraphrase C.S Lewis — if I remember well enough — a friend will ‘see through your enchantments without being disenchanted’. A friend will know you, but will hold you. A friend will see you, but won’t spill you. You will try to be your best, but a friend will see your flaws. Yet, she won’t floor you. Beautiful as we are, we are imperfect beings too. That’s why we need that relationship that is not defined first by performance and regular appraisals.

I am grateful.

I have friends… A number of them. Not every one my age is so privileged.

I am a friend too.

Are you?

RELIGIOUS INTOLERANCE… WE ARE AWARE! – An excerpt 

Now, I’m about to Point Fingers

Truth must be told…

In Nigeria, the North is guiltier of religious intolerance than the South. As I travel around this country, evidences pop-up every so frequently. A few general examples will do for now.

There are still universities (federal and state) in the North, where Christians are denied right to own a place of worship, while Muslims have multiple places, built by the school authorities – many times. There was a case where a school allocates and revokes, and allocates and revokes plots of land for the Christian community. More painful is the fact that the revocations happen when a structure was midway in construction, on an allocated land.

The story is the same for NYSC orientation camps. In some states in the North, Christians are not given a place (to develop) for use as a worship venue. But of course, Muslims are. It is not different with government owned radio and TV stations in parts of the North. There are states where Christians have repeatedly asked to be given slot for religious programming, without success.

Are these evils present in the South? Yes. But they are the rare exceptions, compared with what goes on in the North.

Progress?

We cannot make progress as a nation until we face the truth and say the truth and demand compliance with truth, especially, from those in our ‘camp’. Christians must do a lot to educate Christians and Muslims must do so much to educate Muslims on this matter.

Together we must all speak up against religiously induced oppression and victimization. We must identify such evil for what it is. We should give it no politically correct tag in a bid to avoid offending some people, people who are violating the basic rights of fellow human beings at that.

I know, some people feel we should not offend the bullies, as if the bullied are not very much Nigerians with rights like the big bullies. Several people have been harassed, and victimized at the hands of religious bullies. They have no voice, many times, because the system to fight their cause is the system that oppresses them. Sometimes, this oppression is not just about individuals. Whole communities have been branded and penciled for oppression because they are predominantly adherents of a particular religion. We are aware.

If we don’t speak up, the dream of building a united big nation will just be that, a dream! When people are made to feel like outsiders and liabilities in their own state, simply because of their religious affiliation, how can they be made to believe in a one Nigeria? How will you convince them to give their best for the good of the nation? How?

Let’s arise, shake off the silly dust of our indifference-to-religious-bullying, and face up to the bullies, whether they are Northerners or Southerners. We must also begin to heal, and to win back the hearts of our oppressed brothers and sisters, wherever they are in the land. Let reparations be made where possible.

It is possible…

If you are aware of cases of religiously motivated oppression, anywhere in Nigeria, speak up. Share your experience.

Problems don’t go away because we pretend they don’t exist. They go when we acknowledge and tackle them.

#StraightFromMyHeart

#onlyTheTruthSetsFree

Our Children and their stolen Innocence

10255491_10203027861031694_7233558847708848074_nWhat day is it today?
Tehillah and Duke.
None is 5 years old yet. But they have a strange assortment of words in their vocabulary. No, not from movies. From living.

“Dad, our Pastor’s daughter was killed by the bomb blast.”
“We shall not die, in Jesus’ name.”
“Dad, 15 students died…”
“Boko Haram will not come here in Jesus’ name.”
“Roadblock”,
“Mopol”
“Guns”
“Checkpoint”
“War”
And on, and on.

On the other hand, I can’t remember if they’ve ever attended a children day’s celebration in the open field (or Stadium).

On this Children’s day, I feel for all the children whose innocence has been stolen from them, not by Holly or Nolly Wood, but by the jungle our beautiful nation is turning into… I feel for the Nigerian child upon whom adulthood is violently foisted.

There is no time to be a child in many parts of our land. Not anymore…

Yet, I remember with indicting nostalgia, rehearsing for Children day’s parade.

What will my children, our children, remember?

I remember the thrill of seeing pupils — song in mouth, flag in hand — from other schools, filing through the streets like columns of Angels in procession, to the celebration grounds. What will Tehillah, and Duke, and Asher remember?

I Remember
The special songs, and acrobatic displays, and heat of the scorching sun, and the bond, and the cultural dance, and band boys, and Ice cream (ehm, well, coloured Ice-water). I remember slow-march, and creative Eyes-right. Flutes, tired legs, the joy of coming first, chewing gums, and the pain of not winning. What of Aunties who groomed us for the day; and Uncles who taught us the winning style? Dont you remember? I remember… I remember even more.

May 27,
What will my children remember?

Today, they are at home.
No outings. No novelty. ‘None of the above’. Nothing memorable to file away in Memory for future musings and recollection. Hmm!

Remind me, what day is it today?

Tehillah, Duke, Asher:
Someday, if you are still children, I hope you’d KNOW what it means, what it feels, when I say ‘Happy children’s day!’

Today is a sombre day
Our girls are still missing

But hope…
Someday

#GodBlessMyMotherLand

Grateful & Pained

Pass or Fail
The pain remains
Live or die
The hurt hunts

It is a painful pleasure to thank God for deliverance when
Fellow brothers and sisters have been so dismembered

It’s more, yet akin to the dilemma after the crucial exam
You passed: jubilant. Then news comes: your friend didn’t

You are now not sure how to manage your fortune
So, you try to console your friend
Friend tries to congratulate you
That’s the humane bit of humans

Trouble is, today
Many Christians are too spiritual to be humane
They dress selfishness in a garb of Thanksgiving
They array Insensitivity in a raiment of Gratitude
Brazen pride ooze out
White-coated as capsules of spirituality

When God spares you from
Bomb blasts, or
Assassins, or
Auto-accident
Thank Him. Thank Him
Simple

It’s not because you are
More spiritual, or
More obedient, or
Somehow invincible
It’s not because you refused to die
It’s about Him; not you

Calm down
More spiritual and
More obedient Christians than you — have died
Under more perplexing conditions

Jesus — once and for all — closed the door on any sort of merit-taking when we escape tragedies. He said:

“those eighteen on whom the tower in Siloam fell and killed them, do you think that they were sinners above all men who lived in Jerusalem? I tell you, No…”
(Luke 13:4,5)

Some spiritual fellow won’t like this, but Nigerians:
Pagans
And Muslims
And Christians
All have testimonies
How they were delivered from the recent bomb blasts
And from sundry such tragedies

See,
Someone may have died
Because she made a mistake
Or was disobedient
Or was insensitive
But
You are not alive
Because you haven’t made the mistakes
Or been so disobedient
And as insensitive

Let’s not lose our sense of
Wonder
And Mystery
And Finitude
And Humbled-gratitude
In a guise of spiritual attainment and competence

I’m glad He’s kept me
I’m pained others left

His ways
God’s ways
Are past finding out

Mercy!
Mercy!!
Mercy!!!

We cry
Holy!
Holy!!
Holy!!!
Is the One who is God-Alone!

The Weapon of Voice

“…An adequate relationship with God permits and requires a human voice that will speak out against every wrong perpetrated either on earth or by heaven.” — Walter Brueggemann.

I find fault with people working to ruin GEJ’s government. But I can’t blame them for his response. His response is his responsibility.

Every government has opposition. And, Opposition ‘oppose’ (That’s what they do!). The onus is on the Incumbent to minimize the bite of the opposition. This is what he hasn’t done satisfactorily, giving room for and legitimizing the public outcry, protests, and social media campaigns. @BringBackOurGirls

PRIORITIES
Criticizing the President, in the current case is a non issue as far as I’m concerned. Sincerely, when the lives of so many innocent girls are at stake, as is the case, I am baffled that what some people are primarily concerned about is HOW we talk to/about the President, a President whose response was glaringly tardy and uninspiring, in the aftermath of the abduction. I am baffled.

Some of us should repent!

VOICE
The American President, contrary to what some Nigerians think, is one of the most criticized leaders in the world. apparently, the more freedom of speech a people enjoy, the more speech you’ll get from the people.

I am ashamed of many of our Prominent Christian leaders in the land who have remained mum or have been vaguely vocal over this matter, especially (but not exclusively) those who are publicly cordial with the President. They champion a PRAY-ONLY stance. Today, the noise of the deviants — in large parts (plus Prayers no doubt) — has rightly positioned this matter as an international emergency.

THE POINT IS
Whether the girls are found through the help now offered by the International community is besides the point. At the end of the day, we ordinary Nigerians, as applicable, would have done about the most we can do.
We spoke up.
We stood up.
We prayed up.

We will tell ourselves that:
We used our voice against violence and perceived unresponsiveness. We raised a cry to God, a campaign against terror, and an alarm against complacent, unresponsive leadership. We have the weapon of our voice. We used it.

I want to be sure, to be confident that I was not among those who
held back…
Those who were
Vocal Champions of silence.

I want to be sure that I
Prayed up
Stood up
Spoke up.

I continue
To Pray
To Stand
To Speak
To Hope

ONE DESIRE…
Ultimately, I hope and believe, that someday, soon enough, we will have our girls back.

May God, and the President He has confirmed over us now unite to ‪#‎PleaseBringBackOurGirls‬.

“It is simply astonishing that when the powerless find voice, done at great risk, things must happen differently among the powerful, including God.”
— Walter Brueggemann

‪#‎bringBackOurGirls‬

MY GROUSE, MR. PRESIDENT

Dear Mr. President,

I have heard that some Planners and Propagandists are working hard to give you a bad name, make Nigeria ungovernable for you and possibly force you out of office. I have heard. And I believe there is a lot of truth in what I have heard. After-all, there is no smoke without fire.

Sir, maybe you can’t altogether stop them from their plans and propagandas. But right now, I don’t care what they plan. I care that I have a President who has left them free to roam, to plan, and above all, to execute.

The Grid
Whatever tied your hands, Mr. President, is your worst enemy; not the Planners and Propagandists. Remember the saying about not being able to stop a bird from flying, but being able to do something about whether it perches on your head..? Sir, the bird seems to have perched unchecked. Next level, it has not only perched but has made nests (a colony) in your ‘hair’, for breeding and bleeding. Figures vary on the number of Mates & Allies & Chicks & sympathizers in its nest-in-your-hair, as I write.

I don’t blame you for whatever the self acclaimed great-grand Children of Dan Fodio are scheming… If they are. True, I don’t blame you for that. I blame you Sir, for your seeming ineptitude. No ruler (read President) bears the sword in vain.

You are called C-in-C of the Armed forces of the Federal Republic of Nigeria, for a reason. More sir, aren’t you arguably the most Powerful President in the world, constitutionally? Why aren’t you using your enormous, enviable powers against the Powers-against-Nigeria?

Since you claim to be a Christian like I also do. Let’s do a quick, brief stop at the Bible: Speaking to citizens about their political leaders, scriptures say:

For he (Mr President) is the servant of God to you for good. but IF YOU DO EVIL, HAVE FEAR; for the sword is not in his hand for nothing: he is God’s servant, MAKING GOD’S PUNISHMENT COME ON THE EVIL-DOER. — Romans 13:4 (My parenthesis & caps)

Please, live up to your mandate under God. That’s all!

Have you not heard; haven’t you observed? There is a reversal in the land. Those who do evil have NO FEAR. Those who are law-abiding have ALL THE FEAR. This is an aberration of the plain expectation of God and of the Nigerian people. Correct this absurdity, this injustice going on under your watch. Reverse this reversed order.

You can!
Sir, unleash terror on evil doers. Let the thought of being caught THINKING, not even DOING evil — in the order of Boko Haram — send down spasms of fear through the spine of every son of Belial in this land. You have necessary and sufficient powers to make this proposal a reality. Let those that do evil have fear, as the bible commands and as Nigerians demand & deserve.

Bar or Bury ’em
Nobody is too big to be put behind bars or beneath the earth if he or she dares a nation like Nigeria has been dared. Truth be told: nobody will believe you, Sir, if you try to tell us you don’t have Intelligence info as per those sponsoring mayhem in the land. Put them behind bars while their trial lasts… Let them go out of circulation. Targeting their footsoldiers alone, as seems to have been the case, isn’t helping us. Frustrate the sponsors. You can!

In essence
You have not demonstrated a resolve, in stopping the Carnage in the land, anywhere near the felt resolve of those perpetrating these atrocities within our borders.

This, Mr. president, is my grouse.

God bless Nigeria

Keeping & Feeding Boko Haram:

Can we ever tell ourselves the truth in this country?

If I am questioning ‘ability’ by posing the ‘can’ question, the answer is easily a ‘Yes’. Yes, we can tell ourselves the truth.

But of course I’m asking the big question: “WILL we ever tell ourselves the truth in this country?” Someday, maybe. But WHEN will such a day break?

We have kept and fed BH by the continual dual acts of blatant, brazen Lie-telling and an Ostrich posture, a posture facilitated by Cowardice-masquerading-as-religion (Religion is a handy excuse for inactivity, in this country at least, and for Christians especially).

LIES THAT KEEP BH ALIVE AND THRIVING!
“Poverty, Unemployment and underdevelopment are the root causes of the agitation…” Big lie!
(It cost fortunes to sustain the BH movement)

“Religion has nothing to do with this…” Big lie!
(Those suicide bombers are not dying for PDP or APC, by their own admission)

“The government is doing its best…” Big big lie!
(No ‘big shot’ has been convicted for BH related offense)

“The Northern Elites/Elders are doing their best…” Fat lie!
(Most of them are elusive and vague. They are guilty of complicity or scared of consequences. Those who have been vocal against BH have been threatened, attacked or killed).

“BH is faceless…” Lie!
(They have known camps in known forests in known regions of Nigeria. Does Sambisa ring a bell?)

“Their sponsors are unidentifiable, and when identified are untouchable…” Nonsense!
(No comment. Pure nonsense)

“Nigeria will split if Government takes decisive action against the Nigerians behind BH…” Flat lie!
(Nigerians, not the leaders, are the reason why there is still Nigeria)

“The president’s exit from office, alone, will end the attacks…” Lie!
(BH predates him. What they want must be more than him.)

“Sensoring the content of religious sermons (in churches and mosques) will help curb religious radicalization…” Unrealizable lie!
(It is first a violation of freedom of conscience and speech. Then there will be practical insurmountable problems with execution).

END NOTES
If the government claims not to have reliable intelligence report on the brain behind BH, our intelligence units have lost their legitimacy. They should be scrapped.

It takes lots of money to prosecute the sort of sustained attacks we have suffered at the hands of the beast called BH. They must leave a trail. Nay, trails! Trails in their financial transactions. Trails in arms sourcing. Trails in their recruitment exercise. They must leave trails everywhere, enough to identify the sponsors.

Fighting the foot soldiers of BH alone, won’t take us far on the path of progress against BH. We must come at them from beneath (sponsors) and above (foot soldiers).

When we mollify ourselves with lies, for fear of the discomforts of truth, we may call such act ‘Progressive’, or ‘Enlightened’; it matters nothing. It remains what it is: ruinous, damnable lies.

Tell the truth and it will discomfort many of us.
Continue with the lies and we will all drown.

Only the truth, nothing but the truth saves; will save us!

Next, I should talk about “Religion and Boko Haram” or “Religion and everything else”.

But for now, what other lies do you think we are peddling in the fight against Boko Haram? What’s the truth; What do you think?
Let’s have your opinion.

Ideas for Ideas-engagement

I had a very busy week last week. I should have done the second part of my post “Tuesday — T-shirt and Ageing” last week. I will come back to it. But let’s do this one first.

Trap
If allowed, pride will ruin the best of us.

The more we pursue knowledge, the more deliberate care we must take to keep humble. For there is a calibre of pride that threatens those who go-for knowledge. You know what I mean: The ‘air’ of superiority; the obvious impatience; the condescending mannerism, the subtle disdain that show up when engaging people in discussions, debates, or arguments.

Fact 
If knowledge doesn’t sober you, you aren’t mastering it, you are merely accumulating it. Knowledge is safe only as a servant. Make it your driver and you’ll self-destruct — sooner or later; but surely.

Application
Pride is most evident, with regards to knowledge, in THE WAY we engage/disagree with people when we think we hold a superior position on an issue.

You can disagree graciously while remaining unflinching in your position. There’s a way to do it. Expectedly, the cultivation of this ‘way’ (attitude) is far more difficult than mere collocation of facts and information.

With google search, anyone may pass as omniscient these days. But it takes practiced inner discipline and refinement to hold superior knowledge (real or assumed) yet remain dispositionally courteous and relationally respectful.

Consequences 
When we hold knowledge in pride, we undermine knowledge. When we hold knowledge in pride, we permit people, more, we empower them to disdain (our) knowledge. Because, the ‘way’ we communicate determines people’s receptiveness to what we communicate.

It is offensive, justifiably so, to be proud because of WHAT you know or in HOW you communicate it. People ‘turn off’ from you, if you are proud, no matter what knowledge you’ve got to transmit. That’s why knowledge, truly acquired, should sober its bearer.

Tips
When you engage:
Learn to disagree with views without disrespecting the holder. 
Endeavour to affirm points of agreement, while noting points of dissent. 
Try to respond to expressed views without making personal statements about the one holding the views. 
Be dispassionate. Let the substance of your point do ‘the job’. 
Don’t be quick to label people because of the view they hold, unless you’re sure they self-identify with the label, or unless such label is vital in making your point. 
Again, always always concentrate on the issues, not on dissenters. Always.

Remember
The goal when we engage in conversations, debates and/or arguments is not to ‘bash’ people, neither is it just to win a contest. The goal is not to establish intellectual superiority. ‘Goal is to enhance (mutual) understanding. The goal is to test the logical/contextual rigorousness and veracity of our view(s). The goal is to challenge people’s thinking; and ultimately, to possibly win people. People!

Make it hard for readers/respondents to legitimately dislike you, even when they don’t like your view(s).
Don’t be disagreeable in disagreement.

I am still learning these lessons. I mean I am still trying to internalize them, deliberately practicing them.

In a world of ideas-explosion, what are other ways  to engage civilly while firmly holding and presenting our views?

TUESDAY: Neighbours, T-shirt & Ageing

Preliminaries
It was a Tuesday. That morning, I was in a hurry to catch up with an appointment. Naturally, I had to drive past parts of my neighbourhood.

My neighbourhood: To be candid, I am not an amazing neighbour. It is quite a shame. And I feel bad that I feel bad about it too infrequently. You should also know that sometimes, I prod on for vast portions of a day without noticing me, starving and/or depriving me of basic care, in the process. Again, it is a shame. The explanation about me not giving me due attention is not a sufficient excuse for my rather superficial relationship with families in the hood; but it does put things in perspective a bit, I hope.

Let me work my way back to the Tuesday in focus. Despite my confessed deficits in neighbourliness, I believe in practical, responsive actions to one’s neighbour. I don’t have to know your family tree to give you a ride on Tuesday morning. If our shared propensity for the bizarre and the inhuman was not in such surplus supply, I shouldn’t have to know you to give you a ride from point-G to X-bus stop, within the township. That should just be as natural as lemon. Shouldn’t it?

SCENE 1
I was driving behind an old salon car. I’d love to tell the brand but I couldn’t be sure of so much – given the multi-colour exterior, and dissimilar body parts. From the dressing of the driver however, the car was clearly not being used as taxi. A middle aged woman flagged the car, apparently needing a ride to the bus stop further down the road. The man sped on, not minding the woman. Unasked, I slowed down to do what duty the previous driver had left unattended. The woman, likely in her mid forties, looked at me with a gaze that spoke suspicion and indecision. Finally, she waved that I should leave. She won’t let me help her. Not that Tuesday.

Making sense
Maybe she felt I am too young to be that thoughtful & kind. My T-shirt didn’t help. Neither did the SUV I was driving. People who look like I do, driving such cars don’t care for people that wear such look as she wore (for a younger lady, they may care). Something must be wrong, not right, with this gesture. She chose to err on the less risky, suspicion side of caution. And left me wondering; left me confused in thoughts, for a while. Later, it dawned on me: when kindness of a certain sort is offered unasked, the offerer becomes suspect.

I used to wonder – as a younger man – why it was rare to see fine-car-owners helping workers, on the route to work, or worshippers on the way to church, and anyone else in between. Why there was such snobbery on the part of car owners, I could never tell.

The snobbery gradient is like this: The finer the car, the less likely it is to be of help to neighbours. This means that over time, the finer the car, the less motivated commuters feel to flag it down. The ordinary, air-condition-less car was by far more likely to be of help. Isn’t this one reason it struck the Tuesday woman as odd that I offered her a ride without her asking?

I still don’t know why many car owners act so plastically. In many cities of Africa, fear of being harmed in the process of giving such transit assistance is justifiable. But that, I think, is not the main issue. I suspect vanity, more than security, sustains this practice. Plus a lopsided sense of value.

Let me explain a bit. There is an unfortunate species of human beings among us. They feel more and more important in themselves when they are less and less accessible to ordinary, hardworking folks. This curious class of humans have always been around but they seem to have found new tricks for mass reproduction. They are multiplying their kind with decided frenzy, across generations. Some of their kind do not have cars yet, nevertheless, they all share the same gene. You know the guy who hoards helpful course materials, so he can make the highest grade. You know the chap who ridicules low income earners. Yes you do. They grow up to be the snobs in the car.

Real Deal
What is the big deal in giving two or three people ride on your way to work? How about waving an apology if you are in so much hurry you can’t help? How about being intelligently neighbourly (‘intelligently’ for security’s sake), to even strangers.

It is good to be on time. Good to conserve fuel. Good to avoid distractions. A lot is good. How about being human? Isnt that good?  If we are humans, should we not seek for balance? And balance, as should be obvious, is usually somewhere between the two parallel lines of:
1. Trying to help everyone, and
2. Resolving to help no one.

The T-shirt & Ageing parts of that Tuesday will follow soon.

We can be better neighbours… Let’s be up and about it.

Everything in between

I have resolved to take my dreams of blogging (consistently) to the next level. That is, from the level of dreams to this blog. This is the first step in that resolve.

Here, I want to vent the different issues that plague my mind, now and again, as I travel all over the place – virtually, actually and mentally…

My mind is a lone mill of complexities. A mill of puzzles and optimism and queries and ideas. A mill of joys and hurts and everything in between. I think about thinking, like I am blogging about blogging — right now. Usually alone. And it is not good for a milling mind to mill alone. Let’s reflect together…

Something else
I am not afraid of questions, or of complex answers, or of knotty thoughts and otherworldly stuffs… Let’s throw everything into the mill. Let it do its native job. Seed distills under pressure. The chaff fizzles. It is sure a messy business, but gems are known to come in packs of dirt. Let’s unpack together. Throw in your thought.
Let the mill grind.

A final something
Kindness, not sloppy political correctness, is prized here. Ideas, not people are targets of engagements. Here, we will discuss differences, however deep they run, but we will do so with sustained respect for the dissenter. Dismantle the idea, if you will, but be kind to the holder at all cost. You see, the idea is the target of your fire-power. Reasoned argument — of course — is your fire-power. Not assertions. Much less insults.

The unexamined life is not worth living, Socrates said… So, together, let’s examine the ideas that drive and shape all of our lives. Shall we?

Watch this space. And be sure to share with friends.

Welcome!